English Ashes Squad Collapse Dramatically

SOME of the marquees had already been dismantled. Tickets were half-price, reducing further after lunch. Touts wore forlorn expressions. Fans ambled down King William Street with towels in their bags, anticipating space to spread them on the scoreboard hill for the first time in five days. A total of 17 wickets had fallen on the first four days, and the fifth would be for going through the motions. But this was cricket, the contrary game. This was the Ashes, in the name of which men do damnable things. One bad decision, the first of the match, against England opener Andrew Strauss, prompted a constriction in teammates' throats. Quickly, it became outright panic. Like medieval royals with syphilis, they went suddenly mad. England lost its last nine wickets for 60, the same England that made 6-551 declared in the first innings.How could this be? Certainly, this day was hotter than the first four, and the pitch more mischievous.Adam Gilchrist donned a helmet to keep to Shane Warne. He also stood up to paceman Stuart Clark, and later — much later — Glenn McGrath. Certainly, the masterful Warne held the stage, bowling 27 overs unchanged.But the real crumbling was in the English minds. Three top-order wickets fell to outrageously attacking shots, another was a botch of a run-out. Kevin Pietersen fell prey to vanity. Warne left deep mid-wicket open, so Pietersen played the sweep, the shot he had eschewed for 6½ hours in the first innings, and was bowled — off-stump — behind his legs. Captain Andrew Flintoff chased a wide ball, wicketkeeper Geraint Jones an even wider ball. Yet England knew no middle ground. Runs would always have been its insurance, yet it scored a meagre 30 in the morning session. Australia had come more in hope than expectation, but now played as if possessed. They appealed often, loudly, sometimes hysterically. The umpires, understanding what was at stake, cut them some slack. By tea, England was all out. Only Paul Collingwood remained, unbeaten in nearly 3½ hours. Warne assailed him with ball and bawl, but he showed teammates what a strong mind can bear. McGrath, intriguingly withheld until the 44th over of the day, finished the job. Warne, tired and sore, retired for a shower, Coke and toasted sandwich. Australia was left to make 168 in 36 overs. Now fans streamed across the Torrens from the city, with ever quickening stride, hearkening to the intermittent roars from the Adelaide Oval. Pie stalls re-opened. The authorities threw open the gates. The stands and terraces filled, the crowd's voice became a force. The tide had turned. First innings titan Matthew Hoggard bowled the first over, but Justin Langer and Matthew Hayden crashed 10 from it, so laying down a marker. Captain Flintoff, favouring his ankle, shared the new ball; the time for cotton wool was gone. AustraliaEngland, constrained to attack, did, but inevitably made mistakes. Clarke gained seven from one shot, three with four overthrows. The culprit was Pietersen. As defeat closed, Steve Harmison bowled a wide, now his stock ball, and Jones dropped a catch. But this was merely epilogue. When it was finished, the Australians hugged one another like schoolboys, then ran to salute the crowd like footballers, forgetting even to souvenir the stumps. The applause did not abate for five minutes. Ponting called it the best Test win of his career. The tickets, discounted at the start of the day, were now collectors' items. sustained casualties, as a team on a fifth-evening run-chase must. But it always had the momentum. Ponting, in the form of his life, batted as if this was the first day, not the last. His series average is 225. Michael Hussey, promoted above Damien Martyn, brought urgency and imagination. Repeatedly, he swept Giles, orthodox and reverse. As a left-hander, he had licence Pietersen did not. Besides, he was facing Giles, not Warne. Giles has 3-262 for the series.

In Brisbane, arguably, Australia caught England cold. But this was the win that re-established the natural order. It was the win that could only have been inspired from within a champion team. Only two teams have made more in the first innings and still lost. England paid for timidity in not playing spinner Monty Panesar, and in not making more haste on day one. Australia leads the series 2-0 after two, as it has in three of the last four Ashes series here. The difference now is that England holds the Ashes, needs only to draw and so cannot quite be counted out yet. But England's eyes are glazed, its pulse irregular, its legs the texture of jelly. The same might be true of MCG boss Stephen Gough and the whole SCG Trust.